Too much of decision-making when too young is bad for the children...

In business, salespeople usually like to transact with decision maker. It is more direct and more effective. The decision maker is vested with certain authority to make decisions based on his or her level of seniority and experience, both of which usually take time to build up. It is hard to make good decisions without sufficent experience.

Let's take this scenario into a parenting scene. I have observed that many parents often allow their children to make decisions on what to wear, what to read, what to eat, what to do, what to buy and so on and so forth, from a very young and tender age when they don't even have any experience to start with in the first place. Such decisions may seem trivial and insignificant, but when done repeatedly over time, they would be significant enough to condition the children's minds in a way that leads to parents losing control over the children in later years. In reality, without experience, how can children make good decisions for themselves? Sometimes, they may not even know what they are getting into.

But, there are certain things such as brushing of teeth, somehow most parents would leave no choice to the children, but to even "force" them to brush their teeth from young. Seriously, when the children are young, they probably do not even realise the benefits of brushing teeth. But, because they are "forced" to do it, so they do it mechanically, until when they are much older, when they begin to understand the benefits of brushing teeth, then they do it with understanding.

Many parents may not realise that, once children get carried away making too many decisions, too often, too young, they somehow develop an assumed sense of control and they simply feel that they are in control. This sense of control is exactly what is being felt when the children are on gaming and it makes them feel good when they take control of the game and get promoted from one level to the next higher level. That explains why most children get addicted to gaming so easily.

Because of this and a host of other reasons, many parents nowadays, find it hard to control their children in their growing-up years. The children have already been conditioned since young to feel that they have the right to decide on many things and hence they feel that they need not listen to their parents anymore. In fact, many parents have been listening to their children and even taking instructions from them for reasons most parents know best. As a result, many parents have lost their authority to control their children but that does not discharge the parents of their responsiblilty towards controlling the children. In any situation, it is hard to discharge responsibility without the authority.

Therefore, I think parents should just make decisions for their children when they are young, teach them about why certain decisions are made certain ways, and most important of all, let the children know that the parents are in control. As the children grow up and gain more experience, release the control gradually and monitor their performance. Release more when they reach a higher level of maturity. This should relieve the parents of many unnecessary problems and struggles in parenting.