They Never Listen To Me

By Elizabeth Pantley (2000), author of Kid Cooperation and Perfect Parenting
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If you read the title of this article and assumed it was a parent's statement. Guess again. Our local newspaper asked 100 kids, aged 7 to 17, the question, "What do you wish your parents did differently?' The most common answer? No, it was not more junk food, later curfews or unlimited TV. The most common answer was, "1 wish they would listen to me."

What do they mean?
When kids want parents to listen to them, they don't mean listen and judge, or listen and nag or even listen and solve. What they mean is they would like their attention and interest. What they want is a parent who will put down the remote control, the newspaper or the dishtowel and give them a few minutes of eyeball-to-eyeball listening.

Be an available parent
Being available when your children want you or need you is a powerful expression of love. Too many times parents tell children that they'll talk "later" or "in a minute" and "late" never comes. Typically, when your child wants your attention, and you respond immediately and totally, your child's needs will be met rather quickly. If, however, your child must wait endlessly for your attention, the problem will grow as he waits, or even worse, he'll take his thoughts to someone else, and you'll never know what you've missed.

Listen for the real meaning
Children aren't always accurate and articulate when they talk. Often, parents need to "read between the lines". Even as teenagers our children sometimes deliver words that are very different from their intended meaning. It's an astute parent who can get past the words being said to the intended meaning. We sometimes find it hard to do this because we get caught up in our child's tone of voice or manner of speaking. Or we make up our minds quickly as we assume the conversation will be a copy of past experiences. It's a smart parent who will try to get beyond simply listening and move toward understanding.

What's the end result?
Several things happen when a parent is doing more listening and understanding. One clear benefit is that your children begin to talk to you about the important things in their lives without fear of judgement or criticism. They become much more honest and open, giving you an opportunity to share your thoughts and values in a non-threatening environment. In addition, when you begin to see your child with new eyes you'll like what you see, you'll feel more love for your child, and you'll be a happier parent.

Relax Yourself with some Brain Teasers!!!

1. Why did the moron throw the butter out of the windows?
2. Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
3. What do prisoners use to call each other?
4. What kind of dog tells time?
5. What bow can't be tied?
6. Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
7. What did the spider do on the computer?
8. What kind of button won't unbutton?
9. What do lawyers wear to court?
10. Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean?

To verify your answers, please move your cursor across from here. 1. Because he wanted to see the butterfly, 2. He wanted cold hard cash, 3. A cell phone, 4. A watch dog, 5. A rainbow, 6. Because no body goes with him, 7. To create a website, 8. A bellybutton, 9. Lawsuits, 10. They drop out of the school (a school of fish)

A Sermon To Usher In The Year of The DOG ...

Today was a very special day because the first day of the Chinese New Year falls on a Sunday when Christians go to attend service in their church.

While it is customary for the Chinese to visit their relatives especially on the first day of the new year, we encouraged the Sunday School Students and Church members to continue to come for the Sunday School and the Church Service first, and then their visitation later. So, quite many of them turned up.

I was delivering a sermon to the students in the Sunday School.

According to the Zodiac signs, this is the year of the DOG. So, my sermon was based on a special associations with DOG and it was delivered in Mandarin.

First of all, Let's begin with the word DOG.

DOG when spelt from the right is GOD. So, in the year of the dog, we should be constantly reminded of God in our lives. Bertrand Russell, an atheist said, "Unless you assume a God, the question of life's purpose is meaningless."

As usual, I have used the acronym DOG and created three main points for my sermon:

1. Don't Omit God (DOG) - We should not omit or ignore God in our lives. We should always remember Him and His blessings. Please read Hosea 4:6
2. Devote Ourselves to God (DOG) - We should devote ourselves, our heart and soul, and our resources to God. We should be devoted to serve Him. Please read Joshua 22:5
3. Dependent On God (DOG) - We should be solely dependent on God and His guidance. Acknowledge Him in everything we do, and He shall direct our paths. Please read Proverbs 3:5-6
   

May the year of the dog bring more blessings into your life and that of your loved ones.

Happy Chinese New Year !!!

Wishing YOU and your loved ones a BLESSED Chinese New Year.

May all your dreams and wishes come true

Graduated TODAY. Unemployed TOMORROW!

It worries me when there is an increasing trend of people going for their second or third degree, without a clear and purposeful goal. This is common in certain countries such as China and the Philippines, where unemployment or the lack of employment is an issue. In the Philippines, about 10 million people are unemployed as reported in the local newspapers. In 2004, 7000 graduates in Bacolod, the city where the recent SEA Games was held, were jobless. As the Chinese saying goes, "there are more monks than the amount of porridge available."

While being unemployed, many graduates would think, "Why don't I further my study instead of idling away and not working?". I believe this might be the reason why many of them end up holding multiple degrees. When I was in the Philippines, I met a good number of people on the streets and found out later that they were professors!!! Eventually, does having a few degrees get us a better job, or better pay? If it does, by all means, go for it! But, the truth is, it does not, in most instances.

A very good friend of mine in China has just graduated from the university in Xi An and the parents are already planning to send her to UK for further studies. She communicated with me and asked me for advice. My advice was, read the book "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" by Robert T Kiyosaki before finalising the decision. She said she has read it before. Then, I told her to ask the parents to read the Chinese version of the book. Hopefully, the father would be able to read the book soon and apply the thinking of a Rich Dad as advised in the book. Otherwise, the daughter is going to join the MD (Multiple Degrees) Club soon.

IMPACT of DECISION is greatest at the highest level!!!

A newly-wed couple established a mutual agreement that the husband should make all the major decisions while the wife the minor ones. But, whether the decision is major or minor, the wife is the one who decides.

All of us make all kinds of decisions every day for ourselves, our loved ones, our school, our company, our committees, our society, our country and even our planet.

Every decision made carries with it consequences, good or bad. If the decision is made at lower levels, usually the impact is not that great because the number of people affected by the decision might not be very big. But, decisions made at higher levels would have much greater and wider impact because more people are going to be affected now. Take for example, a decision made by a teacher in a class affects only 30-40 students, while a similar decision made by a minister is going to affect about half a million students.

Knowing the impact decisions could have on people within the system the decision is made for, it is important that we put people who know how to use their brains at those higher positions, not just people with top brains. Top brains have been traditionally associated with the scholars who are academically qualified. But, sometimes, top brains may not know how to use their brains. So, they make all the ineffective decisions. Tony Buzan, the originator of Mind Mapping, has authored a book entitled, "How To Use Your Head".

This reminds me of another scenario. There are many teachers and lecturers who are academically very highly qualified but students always complained that they cannot understand what the lecturers were talking about in the Lecture Theatre. I can relate to this because I was one of the victims before. Also, when I was lecturing in a certain institution, there were always students who came to me to give feedback about certain lecturers. But, frankly it was none of my business! I was not the one who engaged them. You see! Having the head knowledge and knowing how to impart the knowledge to students in a way that they can understand are entirely two different things.

POSITIVE THINKING Helps ...

A shoe manufacturer sent two of their salespeople to Africa to open up new markets. A couple of days after arriving there, one salesperson named Peh See Mee, called the office and said to his manager, "I'm returning on the next flight. There is no market for shoes here. Nobody wears shoes." At the same time, the other salesperson named Oh Tee Mee, sent an email to the manager telling him that "Nobody wears shoes here. As long as we can educate them on the benefits of wearing shoes, the markets are unlimited."

This is the classic story told many times over and over again about positive thinking and negative thinking. Some would try to make it a little different by changing the product from shoes to bras. Whatever it is, the moral of the story is:

Peh See Mee is pessimistic. A pessimist sees difficulties or calamities in every opportunity; Oh Tee Mee is optimistic. An optimist sees opportunities in every calamity or difficulty.

Business WITHOUT Bricks and Mortars...

While making payment for the groceries at a Cashier Counter at the NTUC Fairprice Supermarket, the cashier in her late twenties and I somehow struck a conversation. She was saying that it would be nice if she had a sum of money to start her own business so that what she collects at the cash register is hers.

What she has in mind was a traditional business. This is the most common way of doing business traditionally. That is why many people when talking about business, immediately think of having a huge sum of money to start with, finding a location where they have to check out the rentals, employing someone to help out in case they cannot handle all the activities on their own and a host of other concerns associated with starting and running a traditional business.

Today, in the new economy and in the 21st century, the way businesses are being done is entirely different. Without bricks and mortars, amazon.com has sold tens of millions of books in just a few years. Could traditional bookstores achieve such phenomenal results within such a short time?

My family used to buy our groceries ranging from sugar and cooking oils, fish and prawns to toilet tissues and envelopes all online from this online supermarket called e-mart. You might think that the fish and prawns are not fresh. You would be surprised! The fishes and prawns are deep frozen to ensure freshness. Even the fish, White Promfret can be steamed!!! For those who don't cook or don't know how to cook, you may like to know that fish that is not fresh can never be steamed. Above all, the prices were reasonable. Above a certain amount of purchase, the delivery was free. You order now, you get your groceries within the same day or the next working day. All goods would be delivered to your kitchen!!! You can make payment by VISA, cheque or cash, upon delivery of goods.

Who says you must always have a physical shop to do business? In fact, the hottest and easiest business today is mostly done and transacted through the internet. Yes, there is a shopfront but on the internet. Everything is online and real-time in most cases.

The e-learning business model offered by The Humanitarian Enterprise is a good one. The system is designed in such a way that if someone in Africa logs into your website, visits the shopfront and buys an educational package and pays online via credit card, you will immediately receive an email or an SMS in your mobile phone even if it is two o'clock in the morning. Commissions will be credited into your account with the company. What is the monthly cost to run this business that has no geographical constraint? S$80. Period. Do you know it costs at least S$2000 per month to rent a stall in the food centre to sell chicken rice and it is geographically constrained?

Frankly, if this kind of online business does not excite you at all, nothing else would. If you are interested to know how to join the business, please click here.

Listening With Ears or Mouth?

I have successfully conducted another Motivational Talk today, attended by about 1,300 students in Yuying Secondary School. Thanks to Mrs Lim-Foo, Head of Department of the English Language, of Yuying Secondary School, for coordinating this talk and making it a reality. She was assisted by Ms Ida. Mrs Lim prefers to have the talk held at the beginning of the year so that the students are motivated right from the start. That was a brilliant plan.

Yuying Secondary School was founded by the Hainanese Community in 1910 as a Chinese medium high school. The school mission is: "To develop our students to be confident, upright and resilient individuals who possess the ability to face future challenges and the commitment to contribute selflessly to school and society."

It took 12 minutes for the 1,300 students to settle down in the big hall. But, throughout the entire one-hour talk, I was impressed with the good discipline the students have in maintaining the necessary silence. They were listening attentively, so were the teachers. The teachers indeed showed very good examples.

Besides speaking on many other points, I shared the meaning of the Chinese character "TING" which means "Listen", by analysing the character in both the simplified and the traditional form. The older generation of Chinese learners learnt the traditional form while the newer generations learn the simplified one. The way the characters are written is presented below:

In the traditional form, the left portion of the character shows "the ear" while the simplified form shows "the mouth". Both characters mean "LISTEN". It seems that in the early days, people listen with ears; now, people listen with "mouth", i.e. while listening, they talk at the same time, or they talk most of the time. This phenomenon is common among the students. Well, I think we need to go back to basics. Listen with our ears. We can hear much better.

After the talk, a teacher came forward to me and said, "I have heard many motivational speakers, they were good, they too shared their experience, but, so far you are the best. You were able to capture the attention of the audience."

Wow! She really made my day. Thank you, Teacher!

Eat More Broccoli... Adopt an ALKALARIAN Diet!

Broccoli has been around for more than 2000 years. It is related to cabbage, cauliflower and Brussels sprouts. Broccoli flourishes in a cool climate and moist soil. It is harvested with 8-10 inches of stem left intact. In Singapore, broccoli is available all year round, and is generally air-flown from Australia and the USA.

When choosing broccoli in the market, select heads that have tight and compact bud clusters with an even dark colour. The stems should be a lighter green than the buds and easy to pierce with a fingernail. Avoid stalks with yellowed or open bud clusters and stems that are hard and dry.

When it comes to nutritional value, broccoli tops the list. It is rich in vitamins, high in fibre and low in calories. Broccoli is said to contain as much calcium, gram for gram, as milk. By including broccoli regularly in your diet you can reduce and prevent ailments like cancer, diabetes, osteoporosis and heart disease.

In The Sunday Times, dated 22 January 2006, Michael Lum, an entrepreneur running his own training business and an author of a few books was interviewed. Towards the end, he mentioned that health is more important than money. He mentioned also that he adopted Dr Robert O Young's pH Miracle formula by eating more "alkaline" food such as fresh vegetables, avocado, young coconut, wheat grass, cucumber, sprouts, nuts and seeds. He takes meat sparingly. He said that this was also the diet motivational guru Anthony Robbins follows.

And, of course, he avoids toxic and negative people. He said, "How can you soar like an eagle when you hang around with turkeys?"

Addressing The Young Entrepreneurs Network (YEN)

Larry and I were invited to speak to a small group of aspiring entrepreneurs from the Young Entrepreneurs Network (YEN) in Ngee Ann Polytechnic. YEN is under the leadership of a capable student President, Stanley Chia. Also present at the seminar was Ms Dorene Yeo, Senior Lecturer and Manager, Entrepreneurs-Connect @ NP .

I think nobody could introduce us better than we introducing each other. Larry was being positioned as a telcopreneur while I was the edupreneur™. As usual, Larry has never failed to impress and inspire his audience with his speech eloquence. He shared interestingly and with great humour, nine practical tips about being an entrepreneur. The first being "now + now + now = WOW". He has towards the end of his presentation, delivered a little "sermon" touching on the spirituality part of a successful entrepreneur. Indeed, a good spiritual balance is of utmost importance.

I took over the floor and continued to share some of my latest thoughts drawing experiences from my speaking engagements in schools and in business organisations, the ideas in my two published books and the findings of talking to many young people recently. I highlighted the importance of emotional intellgence in business success and the fact that many entrepreneurs were polytechnic graduates. I also explained the reason why.

Last night, a student emailed me, expressing confused but keen interest in learning how to start a business while in school. He could not imagine how he could start a business. I would be replying to him soon. In fact, many students above the age of 18 could already start earning while learning. They just have to break away and set themselves free from the traditional mindset.

Larry and I would like to wish all these aspiring entrepreneurs great and continued success in studies, in life and in business.

Dare To Dream...

"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams." Eleanor Roosevelt

"All of your dreams can come true, if you have the courage to pursue them." Walt Disney

"It is not whether you get knocked down, it is whether you get up." Vince Lombardi

Have you been wished by someone before, "May Your Dreams Come True!"? So, it starts with the dreams... Have you got a dream? Are you living your dream? Or, it has turned into a day dream or worse a nightmare (a dreadfully bad dream)!!!

74% of Wealthy People Are BUSINESS OWNERS!

I learned the following statistics about people when they reach the age of 65...

• 36% of people are dead,
• 54% broke,
• 5% still working,
• 4% financially independent, and
• 1% wealthy.

Out of the 1% who are wealthy, 74% of them are business owners. A couple of books touch on this subject, such as Cashflow Quadrants and I Don't Like MLM. They are available in major bookstores in Singapore.

Opening Doors Using FINGERPRINTS ...

From office to officeless, paper to paperless, cash to cashless, what is next? Keyless. This is certainly a good news for those who are always careless with their keys!

In time to come, whether home or office, we need not carry the bunch of door keys anymore. We just need to remember our fingers! Our home and office doors could be installed with the Next-Generation Fingerprint Digital Door Lock that has been granted the International Patent. I was shown a sample yesterday. It was really cool!

This Fingerprint Digital Door Lock comes with break-in and crime prevention alarm functions, double-lock function, automatic locking when the door is closed, low-batteries warning and high accuracy. It is able to recognise up to 99 fingerprints and is maintenance-free. Change of batteries has no effect on stored fingerprints and PIN codes.

I was told that the introductory offer price is S$840, and it comes with free installation, one-year warranty and 24-hour backup service.

CHALLENGES help us GROW ...

When I autograph copies of my books, I always like to write this, "Life is full of challenges. But, it can only get better."

Challenges are not there to stop us, but to help us grow. Face the challenges with courage and determination. When we have overcome the challenges, we would be able to bring out the best in us. We become stronger, more confident and more resilient to face future challenges.

Take every difficult situation in our lives as a challenge. Learn to accept it, seize the opportunities that come with it, and get out of it gracefully and with stronger confidence and faith.

So, from now on, let's embrace a new and positive attitude in life by welcoming the challenges.

Just To Tease Your Brain A Little!

1. What do you call a deer with no eyes?
2. What do you call a dead deer with no eyes?
3. What starts with E, ends with E and only has one letter?
4. Where do you find giant snails?
5. What travels around the world and stays in a corner?
6. What is white when it's dirty and black when it's clean?
7. If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

To verify your answers, please sweep your cursor to the right after the full stop. (1) No Idea (No Eye Deer); (2) Still No Idea (Still No Eye Deer); (3) An Envelope; (4) On the ends of their fingers (Giant's Nails); (5) A Stamp; (6) A Blackboard; (7) Wet

Choose Your Friends Wisely...

One evening, two friends were walking in the jungle. Suddenly, a tiger appeared a distance away, and was running towards them. One friend immediately pulled out from his bag a pair of Nike shoes and quickly put them on. The other friend was suprised and asked his friend, "You think you can out run that tiger with the Nike shoes?" "I don't need to out run the tiger", his friend replied, "I just need to run faster than you".

Some People Say IT = Idiot Technology?

A caller called the Technical Support complaining that her mouse was very difficult to use with the dust cover on. After some time, it was discovered that the cover was actually the plastic bag the mouse was originally packaged in.

Computer manufacturers are contemplating changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press Return Key" because they were flooded with calls asking them where the "Any" key is.

A customer complained that her diskettes were defective. The technician asked her to send a copy of her defective diskettes to him. A couple of days later, an envelope arrived from the customer along with photocopies of her diskettes.

The Meaning of STUDENT in English and Chinese...

The Collins Cobuild English Dictionary defines the word "Student" as (1) a person who is studying at a university or college; (2) a person who is studying at a secondary school (used mainly in American English).

In the English context, a student studies. Study is "du" (the character on the left) in the Chinese Language. But, in the Chinese context, a student is called "Xue Sheng'. "Xue" (the character on the right) means to learn.

In short, in English, a student studies; whereas in Chinese, a student learns.

To have a balanced perspective, no doubt a student should study, but more importantly he/she should learn, unlearn and relearn. Learning is a lifelong process. I have not heard anyone say, "Studying is a lifelong process".

The same is true in the Chinese context as can be seen from the phrases presented below. The first line reading from left to right means, "Learning is a lifelong process" and the second, "Studying is a lifelong process."

This Is EXPERIENCE.

One Friday evening, a young engineer was leaving the office. Just before he walked into the front office reception area, he saw the Managing Director (MD) standing in front of a shredding machine holding a piece of paper document in his hand.

The MD turned to him and said, "Excuse me! This is important. My secretary has left and do you know how to make this thing work?" The young engineer instantly replied, "No problem, Sir." and he turned on the shredding machine, inserted the paper and pressed the start button.

The MD was so pleased that the machine was working and he said "Well done! I just need a copy." as the paper slowly disappeared into the shredding machine.

Which School Do You Attend?

In life, with regards to experience, there are basically two different schools, namely the School of Hard-knocks and the School of O.P.E. (abbreviation for Other People's Experience).

Those who attend the School of Hard-knocks usually prefer to learn things their own ways. They make it compulsory for themselves to go through a certain conventional learning path pretty much sequentially, thinking that they could eventually claim ownership of their own experience. Such people usually take a much longer time to learn and ultimately still arrive at just the same destination. Along the way, they accumulate their own experience which is nothing much but a bag of mistakes made here and there. That is why at the end of a certain learning path, people would usually say, "I have gained experience in this or that.". If experience were to be a bag of mistakes, would you still be so proud to claim that you are very experienced in certain things?

On the other hand, those who attend the School of O.P.E would learn from other people's experience. In essence, they are learning from other people's mistakes and making sure that they do not repeat them. They are smarter, wiser and able to make better use of their time to learn new things, venture into new grounds, and create a better future for themselves. There is nothing wrong in borrowing others' experience, learning from it and making it yours. By doing so, you would have saved enormous amount of time. If time equals money and life. Then, you would have made much more money and lived a more meaningful and fulfilling life, as a result of learning from other people's experience. Isn't it true?

Help Yourself with the Self-Help Books!

A student went into a bookstore and asked the salesgirl, "Where is the self-help section?". The salesgirl immediately replied, "If I tell you, it will defeat the purpose." So, please help yourself!

Many people buy self-help books, read them but seldom know how to help themselves. Many readers would expect the author to tell them exactly what to do like a recipe. Self-help books usually provide us with broad principles and guidelines. They must be read by drawing together our own background knowledge and experience, and then applied to our daily situations or scenarios.

For example, in my book, "15 Forgotten Secrets That Will Make You A Better Student", the second principle says, "Appreciate what you have in life". What I usually encourage the children to do after reading it, is to think of how this principle can be applied to their daily lives. For example, they could learn to appreciate their parents by offering a cup of water to their parents when they come home from work.

I was away to the Philippines intermittently for a period of about nine months with varying length of stay each trip. I was always very touched each time when I returned to Singapore. My children would always make a simple card out of an A4-sized paper, write and colour on it, "Welcome Home, Daddy!" and leave it on my desk. It is a simple and economical way of expressing their appreciation for me. It makes me feel good and appreciated.

What is an Advanced Medical Directive?

Doctor: Would you like to donate your organ?
Patient: No, but I did donate my old piano to the Salvation Army!

Do you know what an Advanced Medical Directive is? An Advance Medical Directive allows you to state what you want for your own medical care if you are unable to make decisions for yourself. You can direct that a specific procedure or treatment be provided, such as artificially administered hydration (fluids) or nutrition (feeding); direct that a specific procedure or treatment be withheld; or appoint a person to act as your agent in making health care decisions for you, if it is determined that you are unable to make health care decisions for yourself. This includes the decision to make anatomical gifts of a specific part or parts of your body via organ and tissue donation, or of all of your body.

To read more, please go to any search engine and type in the word "Advanced Medical Directive"

A House is Built by Hands; A Home is Built with Hearts.

Coming to this wonderful and blessed home of Mike really made my day. This lovely couple has three lovely and pretty young daughters. You can feel the closeness of the relationships between the parents and the children. All of them broke into spontaneous laughters when I told them a joke. It was really a nice family and home you wish you could stay a little longer. But, it was late. So, I thanked them for the pleasure of their company and took my leave.

I believe the highly-admired beauty of this family did not happen by chance. All the members of the family have certainly played their respective roles responsibly and effectively. As I have read before, "A house is built by hands, but a home is built with hearts." It is exactly the hearts that have come together to build this home sweet home.

Incidentally, I discovered that the couple are both from the IT industry. They worked together before. So, I was teasing them that they might have failed in love with their work when they started falling in love with each other at work. Hehehe...

There is really more to IT then just Information Technology! While you think they are both in the IT (Information Technology) industry, they certainly have been engaged in another kind of IT (Interesting Talk) at work, developing into another form of IT (Intimate Talk) in the evenings. Eventually, they decided that it was enough. That's IT! Let's get married and live together happily ever after...

This is just another creative business of mine - creating phrases using Acronyms. Click here to read some of the phrases I have created in the past.

May I wish them a happy family built on a happy marriage.

I Knew They Meant Business... For a Laugh!!!

A son did not want to learn mathematics at the school he was in, so his parents decided to send him to a Catholic school.

After the first day of school, their son comes racing into the house, goes straight into his room and slams the door shut. The parents are a little worried about this and go to his room to see if he is fine. They find him sitting at his desk doing his homework. The boy keeps doing that for the rest of the year. At the end of the year, the son brings home his report card and gives it to his parents. Looking at it, they see under mathematics an A+. The parents are very happy and ask the son, "What changed your mind about learning mathematics?"

The son looked at his parents and said, "Well, on the first day when I walked into the classroom, I saw a guy nailed to the plus sign at the back of the room behind the teacher's desk and I knew they meant business."

Do You Know The Purpose of Insurance?

An agent from an insurance company approached me yesterday morning and asked me to help her by investing $8,000 with her. Her group manager had set a quota for all the agents to meet. So, the agents had to go out to do massive prospecting!

When there is a quota to meet, sometimes, it may cause the agents to become too aggressive in their sales, focussing on meeting the target rather than the needs of the customers. Of course, there is such a thing called Financial Needs Analysis which has to be carried out prior to recommending the plan. It does help to a certain extent.

It has been a while since I left the financial planning industry in which I have contributed nine years of my life providing financial planning and advisory services to my clients and recommending the relevant financial products to meet their financial needs. It was certainly a good industry especially the insurance sector.

Insurance has played a significant role in the financial wellbeing of many families. It helps to put food on the table when the breadwinner is gone. The basic purpose of insurance is protection. As the years go by, insurance has evolved to include the elements of savings and investment. But, I still maintain that insurance should be bought for the purpose of protection.

In my years of service, I have marketed many protection plans mainly the Term Insurance Protection Plans. These are temporary insurance. They are usually much cheaper in terms of premium. The only setback is that there is no return on premium paid if death does not occur within the period of coverage. This is the only point which is commonly used to discourage customers from buying term plans. Usually, the commissions for the agents are also much lower. However, if death does occur within the period of coverage, for the same premium paid, the family could receive up to 10 times the amount of insurance proceeds from a term plan as compared to a whole of life plan. I can see that you are clearly confused, if you have not been in this industry before!!!

The next time you need to buy an insurance plan, if you need a second opinion that is objective and unbiased, please talk to me.

Communications in a Marriage ...

Many problems at home or at work, simple or complex, big or small, arise from miscommunications or non-communications. Communications is especially important in a marriage. But, you would be surprised how communication relationships change in a marriage as the years go by.

In the first year of marriage, the husband talks, and the wife listens. Why? The wife being submissive, listens to the husband. That is wonderful.

In the second year of marriage, the wife finds that most of the time, what the husband says does not make sense. She finds it hard to submit to him. So, she takes over the role. Now, the wife talks, and the husband listens.

In the third year of marriage, the husband could not accept the fact that she has to submit to the wife instead. He wants to talk now. But, the wife also wants to talk. So, at the end, both talk and the neighbour listens. Both continued to talk in the fourth year and the neighbour continued to listen.

Eventually, they decided to go to the court. In court, the judge talks and both of them listen.

The Symbolic Meaning of Chinese Characters...

I visited a home in my neighbourhood. On the walls of the living hall were the Chinese characters, "FU" which means blessings, written in several different forms on different media.

One of them was written using a Chinese Calligraphy brush. It was the work of the younger daughter in the family. It was written quite neatly artistic. The right and left portions that make up the character were quite distinctive. Chinese characters are usually symbolically meaningful. Take the character "FU" for example:

The left portion signifies "GOD" while the right, reading it top-down, is "One mouth in the field" which means a man ploughing the field. Putting them together means "A man ploughing the field with God's presence" is "FU" = Blessings.

Many Chinese do believe that blessings come from above. So, in this family, there was another character "FU" that was hanged inverted to imply that blessings are being showered from above.

May I take this opportunity to wish all who celebrate Chinese New Year, a fruitful year filled with lots of BLESSINGS from above.

A Potentially Great and Inspiring Teacher In The Making...

I got to know someone who is making very good use of her time, working and studying part-time attending regular classes, so diligently. She is expected to graduate one year from now and she is so passionate to be a good teacher.

She comes from a remote place in the southern part of the Philippines, which is about an hour away by plane from where she is working and studying right now. She is away from home. She juggles her studies with work so well. She is enthusiastic and self-disciplined. She reads psychology, philosophy, sociology etc. and is preparing for her examinations on the coming Friday. Best wishes to her.

For those who are so fortunate to be full-time students with the living and educational expenses all taken care of or fully paid for by their parents, it is indeed a blessings. Be grateful and appreciative always.

Don't Jump Into Conclusion Too Soon !!!

My copier has been out of order for a couple of weeks. The print was faint with smudges at regular intervals. I have just arranged for the technician from the servicing company to perform a service check.

After troubleshooting for some time, he told me that the rotating drum was dirty at certain areas. He had cleaned it. The other problem was that the paper I use was damp. He proved his point by using the same sheet of paper for the second time when it was already warm. The printout seemed alright!!!

Besides that, he said that it could be due to the moisture because of the rainy season. But, it did not appeal to my logic because the machine has served me through ten Decembers and Januaries. This was the first time I was having such a problem. Later, he told me that certain brands of paper may not be suitable for use on copiers. But, the ones I bought were labelled, " for use with copier, fax and printer". So, what should I do next? Buy new rims of paper and make sure that the paper was not damp , or run my paper through the machine twice to warm it up first, which would double the meter count on the machine? Is there something else that the technician might not know?

Anyway, I would just get a new rim of paper from another source, try it out and see if the problem would be resolved as the technician claimed. It is best to be open-minded and not to jump into conclusion too soon. The technician might just be right.

I was told a story years ago, about a person having persistent knee pains. He tried every kind of medication and treatment available but nothing worked. One day, someone just suggested to him to change his pair of shoes. He did as suggested and true enough, the knee pains went away right after he changed to a new pair of shoes. You see! Being open-minded really helps.

Humility Is A Highly Sought-after Virtue !!!

I met a System Analyst from China. He was one of the very few Chinese nationals in Singapore who impressed me with his down-to-earth attitude and humility. I told him my positive impression of him.

But, unfortunately, in less than five minutes, the wife had said something to him, which influenced his thinking. I believe that the wife had said something out of her national narrow-mindedness and chauvinistic arrogance. The wife spoke to me only a a few words but forcefully came across to me as self-centred, arrogant and unfriendly. Anyway, I continued to talk with the husband.

As the man admittedly told me, many people in China (supposedly including his wife!!!) have locked themselves up from the outside world for too long. As a result, many of them still think they are indispensably great nationally and culturally. This self-perceived greatness has been unconsciously expressed in their speech and through their actions. This is generally true if you have been observant enough.

You might be aware that it takes great effort and financial resources for someone in China to go out of his or her country and stay abroad. When one is able to achieve that, inadvertently, both the national superiority and personal inferiority complexes set in. This creates a very confusing identity in some of them. SOME of these Chinese nationals abroad have, over time, created a culturally and socially unacceptable behaviour in certain countries including Australia, as I have been told stories of incidents that happened there.

As a Chinese Singaporean who speaks, reads and writes formal Chinese Language with reasonably good grasp of the Chinese cultural background, I feel ashamed of such behaviour. Therefore, I could not help but to tell the man and indirectly the wife, with some elaborations, that there is no place in Singapore and most parts of the world, for people who are self-centred and arrogant just because of the more than 5000 years of long-standing civilisation.

There is nothing wrong in feeling good and great about one's cultural history and identity, but we should be constantly reminded that humility remains an important and highly sought-after virtue till today!!!

Mind Mapping - A Powerful Technique for Taking Notes...

Years back, I learnt mind mapping on my own. I have been using it regularly. This technique is especially useful for students.

The human brain is very different from a computer. Whereas a computer works in a linear fashion, the brain works associatively as well as linearly. Association plays a dominant role in nearly every mental function, and words themselves are no exception. Every single word, and idea has numerous links attaching it to other ideas and concepts.

Mind Maps™, developed by Tony Buzan are an effective method of note-taking and useful for the generation of ideas by associations. Mind Maps help organise information. Because of the large amount of association involved, they can be very creative, tending to generate new ideas and associations that have not been thought of before. Every item in a map is in effect, a center of another map.

The creative potential of a mind map is useful in brainstorming sessions. You only need to start with the basic problem as the center, and generate associations and ideas from it in order to arrive at a large number of different possible approaches. By presenting your thoughts and perceptions in a spatial manner and by using colours and pictures, a better overview is gained and new connections can be made visible.

Mind maps are a way of representing associated thoughts with symbols rather than with extraneous words. The mind forms associations almost instantaneously, and "mapping" allows you to write your ideas quicker than expressing them using only words or phrases.

What is INVISIBLE can be HORRIBLE!

Many Singaporeans begin to embrace aromatherapy as an alternative treatment for common illnesses, but some would use it just for the scent or aroma. There are many aromatic products in the market, the most common one being the aromatic candles. I am not sure why many people do not give it a deeper thought when they use aromatic candles?

When one burns an aromatic candle in the room, common science knowledge tells us that the candle needs oxygen to burn. So, it is taking away oxygen from the air and hence competing with us for oxygen. As it burns, it produces carbon dioxide. We, too exhale carbon dioxide. Imagine you use the candle in an enclosed room. By the next morning, the room would be filled with more and more carbon dioxide and less and less oxygen. As science also taught us that when combustion takes place with insufficient oxygen, it produces carbon monoxide that kills. Recently, there was a CEO of a country club who committed suicide allegedly by placing a burning stove in his room. He might have died from carbon monoxide poisoning!

Burning a candle also produces soot or pollutants that pollute the air. The people in the room might just inhale all the pollutants into their lungs. You see, we totally have no control over the air we breathe in, unlike water or food which we can choose not to drink or eat if they are not clean. We can't say we don't want to breathe when the air is dirty or polluted.

To make things worse, some of the candle wicks are inserted with lead to prolong the burning. The fact that most motorists use unleaded petrol shows that lead is bad for health, it damages the brain. A certain university in USA has conducted tests and confirmed that some candles do release lead into the air. It causes behavioural and learning problems in children.

There are better aromatic or aromatherapeutic products in the market, which many people are not aware. I am using them myself. If you do need some tips, I don't mind sharing with you if you were to write to me.

A Leader in Every Student...

On 12 January 2006, with the coordination of Mrs Gloria Gurung, the Subject Head of Values Education in CHIJ St. Nicholas Girls' School, I had successfully conducted a one-hour Motivational Programme entitled "Secrets to Success". It was attended by about 750 students from Secondary One and Two.

CHIJ St. Nicholas Girls' School is a school that has as its mission, "A Christ centred school where all people work for the promotion of truth, justice, freedom and love; with a special awareness of the viewpoint of the disadvantaged."

After my talk, the Vice-Principal, Mdm Goh rounded up the session with her praises for those students who were listening attentively and even taking notes. She went around reading some of their written notes. Those who took notes would surely benefit the most from the motivational talk. Of course, there was a minority among the audience, who were a bit restless and inappropriate in their behaviour as Mdm Goh put it. She was quick to highlight the opportunity for further improvement.

With my own eyes and ears, I have witnessed the strong and effective leadership that has made the school a school of choice for many parents. The school leaders spare no effort to ensure that the vision is achieved, i.e. A Leader in Every Student.

I appreciate the partnership I have with the school. As stakeholders in education, we just want to give our best to the students.

Best wishes to all the students in CHIJ St. Nicholas Girls' School. God bless all of you in your studies and in life.

Something About Book Translation and Piracy in China!!!

I was recently approached to translate a Chinese MLM book into English. The author who is a Chinese, had someone translated the book for him before but did not seem too pleased with the translation. So, a friend of mine who had seen my translation work before, asked me if I would be keen to help with the translation. I told her I would try. So, yesterday, I have translated 3 pages of the book quickly and emailed to her the sample. In response, she sent me an SMS that read, "Wonderful and easy to understand."

There are parents who have been asking for the Chinese version of my first book, "15 Forgotten Secrets That Will Make You A Better Student". I have actually translated a section of it already... But, the market for the Chinese version may not be that great at the moment...so, it should take a lower priority.

I have also been approached to have my second book, "I Don't Like MLM!" translated into Chinese, published and distributed in China. Well, I am privileged to be accorded such recognition for my work. But, my $8.90 book might fetch only $2 in China as I was told by someone from China. Whew! $2? My initial thought was "forget it!". I might as well do charity if the book were to sell at such a low price. Moreover, open, rampant and sure-to-happen piracy the very next day the authentic version is out in the market, is a given!!!

So, is China a good market for my book? Is China a Dragon (Long in Chinese phonetics) or is it a Worm (Chong in Chinese phonetics) as far as economy is concerned? Hmmmm... Let me sit on it first... I have translated a portion of this book on my own anyway...

In my humblest opinion, I don't think anyone could translate my own book better than I, for I am personally effective in both the languages and I know the thoughts behind every word and sentence that I have written in the English version. Did I sound arrogant? I hope not. If I did, I was just being arrogant in an ignorant and humble way!!! Hehehee...

A Strange Encounter That Has Helped Me Save 80% of My Mobile Outgoing Call Charges...

One afternoon last year, while waiting to be served at the counter at a Photocopy Shop at the basement of Sim Lim Square, I struck a conversation with a gentleman standing beside me. I later learned that he was the manufacturer of an International Callback Card. He explained to me how it worked and I was amazed. Immediately and with much curiosity, I bought one card from him and tried it out. Bingo! It was excellent in helping me cut the mobile bills by as much as 80%. So, I have been using this international callback card since last year.

You may be wondering how it works? It is simple. Usually, you would dial your friend's phone number directly. Now, just do one extra step, i.e. dial a special number given to you. Your call will be disconnected. Wait for your phone to ring, then enter the country code, area code and then your friend's phone number followed by # sign. You will then be connected to your friend's phone. That's it. So, the one extra step is worth the effort because it helps you save 80% of your outgoing call charges.

For example, if I want to call my friend in Singapore whose number is 91234567. I would dial this special number 90255256 first and then my call would be disconnected. In a short while, my phone would start ringing. I just press "answer call" button and then enter 65 for Singapore (63 for Philippines, 60 for Malaysia etc) followed by the phone number 91234567 and end with the # sign. That's all. I am now connected to my friend and I can start talking once he picks up the call.

This card is similar to the normal calling cards but it calls back. It is not a SIM card. It needs your existing mobile phone with a regular subscription plan that has FREE incoming calls, to work. If you were to use this card to make calls within Singapore, a $10 card could last 303 minutes. That works out to be 3.3 cents per minute which is by far the cheapest in Singapore. Your usual outgoing call costs about 15-20 cents per minute. If you were to call USA, Canada and China, this S$10 card could last more than 200 minutes. The rates vary for different countries.

CLICK HERE for more information on the card...

Don't Reinvent The Wheels!

This afternoon, I met a nice young Indian girl studying in Secondary 3. She was gentle, well-mannered and keen to learn. Her command of English was excellent as her mother revealed. She likes to read. I encouraged her to read my book and be inspired to write her own book one day. I believe she would.

Actually, reading is very important in improving one's command of a language. You may like to know that all leaders are readers. It is through reading that we learn about other people's experience (OPE) and thoughts. By tapping on other's experience and reading about their thoughts, we would be able to speed up our learning and shorten the learning curve.

What is the point of walking the same path and going through the same situation that someone has walked and tumbled into before? Learn the smarter way. Don't reinvent the wheels! A new generation should continue to build on the foundation laid by the last generations. There is no need to lay the foundation again unless it has become structurally weak and threatens the stability of the building.

Professionally and Emotionally Intelligent...

This evening was so special. I met separately three Indian gentlemen who came from India but are all permanent residents of Singapore now, with their families. They were so nice and warm. They are all professionals in their respective fields. We communicated for some time and there were so many things we learnt from each other about life, cultures, work and business.

One of them shared about his business experience. He said that the best form of business is one that is online or internet-based. There will be no handling of physical products and no logistic issues to worry about. He was an experienced trader before. He has been in business long enough to be wise and experienced enough to know what business works best in this IT age.

As I recollect, over time, I have met a good number of nice, warm and unassuming Indian professionals (from India) staying in Singapore. Their cultural behaviour is quite similar to that of Filipinos. Frankly, I can't speak the same for people from other countries as yet. Perhaps, you would know the countries I might be referring to. But, I would keep you in suspense!!! Hehehe...

What A Small World After All !!!

Yesterday, I happened to chat with a Filipina who is married with two children, one in Kindergarten and another one in Primary One. The husband is a professional working in Singapore and the family has been staying here, in my neighbourhood, for a couple of years.

There is something typical of Filipinos. The sincerity and warmth in their heart is naturally manifested through their outward expressions and gestures of hospitality. Naturally, she invited me into her home without hesitation.

As we continued the conversation at the gate, she told me that she came from San Fernando in La Union in the northern part of Luzon. It immediately rang a bell! Oh yes! That was the place where I had stayed for a couple of weeks. San Fernando of La Union (because there is another San Fernando in Pangasinan) is about eight to nine hours of bus ride away from Makati. Indeed a small world that we met here in my neighbourhood! For the uninitiated, the Philippines is divided into three large zones, namely Luzon, Visayas and Mindanao.

In fact, the world was made even unbelievably smaller when she told me she graduated from the Nursing School of Union Christian College (UCC). Hey! That rang another bell!!! Isn't that the college in La Union? YES. That was the college where I was invited to speak to the graduating students when I was in the Philippines last year. Isn't the world really small?

Hmmmm... A word of advice: Better not do funny things or monkey business elsewhere, thinking that nobody would come to know! But, your neighbour might know, you know?

Well, as we continued talking, the new friendship certainly became friendlier when I started to impress her with a few Tagalog (Filipino Language) words. Frankly, I don't speak much Tagalog, but have picked up enough simple vocabularies just to impress. Ooops.. Did I just let the cat out of the bag? Anyway, speaking a person's language usually breaks the ice and closes the communication gap more quickly and easily.

From my experience, it makes the learning of Tagalog easier if you know the Malay Language. The pronunciation of the Tagalog words is very similar to that of the Malay words. For example, Mahal kita = I love you. Anong pangalan mo? = What is your name?

Have I wetted your appetite to learn Tagalog? May be not, unless you have a Pinay girlfriend or Pinoy boyfriend?! So, you might be wondering why I learnt Tagalog? I will keep you in suspense indefinitely!!!

Let's Get A Little Linguistic For A Change !!!

In one of my conversations yesterday that touched on languages, it was mentioned that Singaporeans are known to speak a special brand of English called Singlish, i.e. Singaporean English. Singlish is so unique that most of the time, when it is spoken overseas, few foreigners could understand it.

Take for example, "Everything also I don't have!" or "I everything also don't have". This is a literal translation from the spoken Mandarin. What it means is, "I have nothing!". Another one, "Wait I call you!". What it means is, "I'll call you in just a moment!".

Langugages must be learnt and spoken in its own cultural and grammatical context. They should not be translated from one to another. Learning of grammar is fundamental to the learning of any language. Unfortunately, in the name of creative teaching and improvement, certain fundamental rules of language learning have been seriously violated. We should not adopt the UK method of teaching English in Singapore because English is the mother tongue of Britons but not of Singaporeans. So, if we were to adopt the UK method that does not emphasise the teaching of grammar, Singaporean students would end up being weak in the English grammar. That is obvious, isn't it?

When it comes to the learning of Chinese Language, recognition of each Chinese character is essentially fundamental and fundamentally essential because every character is significant and unique. But, han-yu-pin-yin (Chinese phonetics) was made the way to learning Chinese without much emphasis on the character recognition. Eventually, we ended up with students who could speak reasonably well but could not write well. Han-yu-pin-yin is just the Chinese phonetics. Period. How can students learn the Chinese Language by being made to read the entire passage in phonetics? But, it is heartening to see some positive changes taking place since a couple of years ago.

Students should learn as many languages as possible. Will it create confusion in the mind? Absolutely NOT. Have you come across some families in Singapore, where the young speak to their grandpa in Teochew, to the grandma in Cantonese, to their mother in Mandarin and to the father in English? We have the natural abilities to learn many languages at the same time. I speak, read and write three main languages. But, I have seen people who learn and speak at least six languages. I am impressed!!!

What is LOVE?

What is Love? I think LOVE is most aptly explained in the following paragraph...

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

CLICK HERE for a useful link...

The Importance of pH Balance in the Body...

All of us know that our body temperature balances at 36.9 degree Celcius. Above that, the body is having fever. Are you aware that our body pH should balance at pH value of 7.365?

But, for most of us, our body is acidic, i.e. the pH value is usually less than 7. Why is it so? The body becomes over-acidic because of our inverted way of eating, living and thinking. You might have noticed that the pH value of Evian mineral water is 7.2. That is slightly alkaline. The body needs to be alkaline. So, we should consider drinking more alkaline water and taking more alkaline foods such as broccoli, spinach and most of the green stuff.

But, most of us may not have the discipline and convenience to start on such a kind of diet. Hence, a convenient way to alkalise the body is to take something called SuperGreens powder developed by Dr Robert O Young. Just add one scoop/teaspoonful of SuperGreens powder into the water you are drinking and that's it. Drink 2-3 litres of water a day for better health.

SuperGreens contains 47 organic grasses, vegetables, leaves and sprouts plus 125 naturally-occurring vitamins, minerals and amino-acids. When the body is alkalised, acids would disappear and naturally there is no need for fat in the body anymore. The presence of fat is actually to protect the arteries, vein and organs from being corroded by the acid in the body. Those who have tried this product usually have their weight reduced, body energised and health challenges reversed.

Desperation or Inspiration

"Desperation is doing something when we have no choice; inspiration is doing something when we still have a choice. Be inspired. Don't be desperate." .................. Jonathan Ooi

Do You Fit The Bill? The Computer DOES!

The "January" page of my standing calendar for 2006 reads, "We're looking for someone who is high in EQ, multitasking, fast worker, must work overtime and paid the least. Do you fit the bill?"

Wow! It seems that employers are getting more and more demanding huh! Except for the EQ (Emotional Intelligence), a computer probably would fit the bill perfectly well.

A computer surely multitasks better than any human being depending on the RAM (Random Access Memory) size, it certainly works faster than a human depending on the CPU (Central Processing Unit) speed, and it tiredlessly works 24/7/365, round the clock without complaints or arguing with you.

The only thing you may not like about a computer is that it likes to play joke on you when you need it most - it hangs as it likes -(taking MC or Medical Leave!!!). But, it is alright because that is just the computer's way of telling you it has overworked a little or it is getting a little sick and tired. Occasionally, it may be down with some PC-flu virus, just give it a PC-cillin antiviral medication and it should be on its way to recovery. Of course, if you don't take good care of it, sometimes, it may suffer from digital dementia or loss of memory or you may have to change some components or perform some electronic transplants. When it is too old and too slow, you just replace it with a new one that is always faster in speed and more sleek and sexy in appearance. The computer is pretty much a Digital Human. Perhaps, that is what the employers are looking for?

Frankly, if any human were to possess all those qualities demanded by the employers, it is unlikely that he wants to be employed. It would certainly make more "cents" for him to be his own boss. Does it make "cents" to you?

I'm Thankful To A Thoughtful Friend...

I just had supper with a very good friend of mine working in a multinational corporation holding a senior managerial position. He is an honest and responsible person at work and outside work.

He is such a thoughtful, gentle and kind friend. We would meet up regularly after his work. When it comes to dinner and supper, he is always the one who insists to pay. I am deeply appreciative of him. I just pray that he would continue to do well in his job so that he can buy me more dinners and suppers!!! Hehehe.... Just kidding.

But, very often, he has to work in the small hours. This is the situation when you are working for someone. You receive the salary from the company, so you are expected to give your life to the company!!! Isn't it true?

Robert T Kiyosaki, the author of "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" wrote another book "Cashflow Quadrants". In this book, he mentioned about the ESBI quadrants. He encourages people in E (employee) and S (self-employed) quadrants to consider moving to the B (business owner) or I (investor) quadrants. E and S earn linear income while B and I earn residual income.

Recently, my friend was away to the United States for business. But, I was pleasantly surprised that he bought the bicycle plate for me with my name pressed on it. He presented it to me just now.


I am indeed blessed with a good friend like him. It is so nice to know that he remembered me even when he was away. Thank you, my friend.

The Mindset of An Optimist and A Pessimist...

I met a Filipino this evening when I was doing my social service. It was not difficult for me to immediately recognise from his look that he is a Filipino. That was partly due to the fact that I have stayed in the Philippines for 9 months. He was so warm towards me and without hesitation, he wanted to open the door for me to go into his home, unlike most Singaporeans. We chatted for about 10 minutes.

When I was in the Philippines, I spoke to many Filipinos. There was a clear contrast in the response to a certain question, between Singaporeans and Filipinos.

When asked, "Are you interested to start a business?", Singaporeans would reply, "No, I have no time, no money, no experience, no interest etc....." whereas Filipinos would reply positively and say, "Yes, Sir. What business is that? Can you please tell me more?".

Singaporeans would think, "What if I can't make it?" - negative thinking, whereas Filipinos would think, "What if I make it?" - positive thinking.

This reflects the difference in the mindsets and attitudes of people from the two countries. You might have heard this before, "An optimist sees opportunity in every calamity, while a pessimist sees calamity in every opportunity."

Think positively. Change the mindset and change the world. Change the mind and change your destiny. "What the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve." - quote from Napoleon Hills.

What A Joy To See Students Becoming Teachers soon...

Yesterday was another busy Sunday for me.

I started the Sunday by leading the Sunday School congregation in songs. I love the songs so much. I enjoy helping the congregation to sing the songs well. That is part of the Sunday Worship.

After the singing, the students were dispersed into their respective classes. My class which consists of students of Secondary One and above, was considered to be more matured in terms of age, as compared to the other classes. I have a few mothers who are learning together with me in the class weekly. They are truly inspired learners. But, wait a minute... Hmmm.... where are the fathers by the way? Perhaps, we should get fathers into the class huh?

I have made arrangement for four of our more matured students to become Trainee Teachers beginning this year. They are now being seconded to the other classes to understudy and learn. They have been great and wonderful students whom I have seen growing in my Sunday School over the years.

I have started a couple of weeks ago, sharing with my class, "The 12 Steps for Christians". Many real-life stories are shared to make the learning more practical and relevant.

At 11am, we started our Adult Worship Service. The speaker for the day was Rev Ho Kum Weng. He was sharing about "Becoming a Grateful Christian". I was interpreting for him from Mandarin into Hokkien simultaneously. It was the first time I invited him to speak in my church. He spoke about how some Christians say grace (a prayer of thanksgiving for food) at the food court or public eating places. It seems that many of them would suffer headaches before taking the food!!! Why? He observed that some Christians who are afraid to be identified as Christians at the food courts or hawker centres, would usually cover their forehead with their hand or fingers and bow their heads and say their grace hastily to avoid being noticed!!!

At 1.45pm, I started chairing two Committee Meetings consecutively until 6pm. Many issues and concerns were discussed and addressed. I left the church with my committee members and my wife. We went to the nearby coffeeshop to buy dinner home for our children and mother-in-law. We had our dinner together at about 7.30pm.

At 9pm, I did my usual social service by talking to residents in my neighbourhood. I am passionate about sharing my experience with many young adults and students. I spoke to a National Serviceman and we were both inspired. The last person I spoke to was a girl in Secondary 3 with her mother. I could see that the girl was in deep thought listening to me. It was 10.45pm when I was on my way home.

Thank God for a Sunday well spent. How did you spend your Sunday?

It is NOT WHAT We Say, But HOW We Say It ...

A Civil Emergency (CE) Exercise was conducted this morning in Singapore. Based on the recent multiple terrorist attacks on the public transport networks in London and Madrid, the three hour emergency exercise, which started at 6.25 am, simulated simultaneous bomb blasts at the various locations as well as the release of a chemical agent at the Dhoby Ghaut MRT Station.

As I was watching the news this evening, various responses of the public were broadcast. One man when interviewed, said that the public should have been informed of the intended emergency exercise beforehand so that they were better prepared!

Frankly, I don't know where that man came from?! He was like asking the terrorists to inform him first before the attack, or asking the burglars to alert him first before going into his house! Hehehe.. it is funny.

Anyway, everybody is entitled to their own opinion. But, I believe what we say every day somehow reflects the length, depth and breath of our thinking. In communications, it is worthwhile to note that, it is NOT WHAT we say, but HOW we say it.

Free Entrepreneur Personality Test

All of the great entrepreneurs know the secret to their personality type and they use it to their advantage. That's what has allowed them to become so successful. It turns out Leonardo da Vinci had the same personality type too. That's why this entrepreneurial personality type is now called the "DaVinci type" personality. Less than 10% of the world's population has this rare personality type. Do you?

Do you have what it takes to be a great entrepreneur? Take the FREE Entrepreneur Personality Test

Treasure It Before Losing It!!!

Do you realise that we tend to treasure something more after we have lost it? It could be our health, it could be our belongings, it could be our loved ones or friends, or it could be our wealth. The joy is unspeakably greatest when we are able to recover what has been lost. But, how often we get to recover it?

Come to think about it, why should we go through such agony of losing something in life and then treasuring it, hoping that it was not lost? Does it make better sense for us to be proactive, and to treasure what we have before losing it? Perhaps, we could look at our state of health, management of our wealth, our relationships with people around us and so on...

A Book Title That Is Controversial and Socially NOT So Acceptable Yet!

The author of "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" has also authored another book that is less known to many especially those who strongly believe in getting a degree and finding a stable job. The title of the book is traditionally controversial but economically sensible. Hold your breath before you read the title!

The TITLE is "If you want to be rich and happy, don't go to school?" Most educators and teachers would not even take a second look at this book, late alone reading it. What? Don't go to school? That must be crazy! That is the last thing you would want to tell your children, right? Hmmmmmm... Please go get the book and read it... Buy, borrow or steal it from someone!!! Hehehee...

Make A Life or Make A Living...

I spoke to a student yesterday, who is currently studying in Singapore Polytechnic. He was such a keen learner that he was listening very attentively to me for about 10 minutes. He told me that he wanted to learn how to do business. I could see that this young man is different from most other students of his age.

He bought a copy of my book, "15 Forgotten Secrets.." with my autograph. Later, his mother spoke to me for another 20 minutes. We engaged in a very smooth communication and discussed about how her son could benefit from my experience in training, developing and motivating young people in career and business. I do run a programme in the community clubs, entitled "Be Young, Be Bold and Be Rich".

In case you are not aware, we would be seeing more and more of the next generation going into business on their own. The book, "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" by Robert T Kiyosaki has changed the perceptions of many people about making a life and making a living.

High Tech and High Touch!!!

I am glad to have a new friend from the United States who holds a Master's Degree in Nursing Education. And she is Helene. She is a wonderful woman who has been practising nursing for the last 20 years. She has a wonderful family with two wonderful children whom she is always proud of. I was told that her daughter just won several contests at the local and district levels, for the poster she did on "Peace without Borders". It will be reviewed at the state level. Don't be surprised one day if this poster wins at the international level. Best wishes to Lianne!

Helene has just started out recently on a nutritional MLM company. She is so passionate about what she is doing. She is a product of the product of her company. She sees and talks to people everyday. We realise that though we are in an age with unprecedented high-tech facilities, we still need the high touch, face-to-face, eye-to-eye contacts, body language expressions etc. That is why till today, insurance is still hard to sell over the internet. Buying insurance involves interactive discussion and transfer of emotions.

I read a book by Dan Sullivan, entitled "21st Century Agent" that highlighted something interesting. While microchip technology changes every 18 months, there are ONLY two things that can never be replaced by the microchip technology, they are Creativity and Relationships.

Think about it and make sure you have them and develop them to the fullest. Cheers............

Take The Stress Out of Your Children's Education...

As a Founding Chairman of two Parents Support Groups, I had the opportunity to interact with many parents and hence understand their concerns for their children. Most parents are anxious about how their children would cope with the demand of the education system here. As a result, they would inadvertently stress out their children. Ultimately, they themselves get stressed out, too.

Due to this reason, I have initiated a programme called "I.C.A.R.E™ for My Children". This programme was developed and trademarked by me. It is being promoted by the People's Association to all the Community Clubs in Singapore. The programme is specially designed and tailored for such parents.

The programme discusses the common problems faced by most parents in today’s competitive environment in relation to their children’s education. It will also explain how parents can apply the special and proprietary I.C.A.R.E™ Model to help overcome the problems they face with their children's education and reduce the stress on themselves.

Does Spending Long Hours in School Contribute to The Desired Outcome of Education?

My friend's mother just passed away, after struggling with the liver disease for about seven years. A few parents met at a funeral wake and started sharing about their children's situation in school.

One mother talked about her daughter in a junior college coming home very late at night. She got anxious about it and so she and her husband decided to drive to the college to take a look. Upon reaching the college. Both of them realisad that the entire cohort was packed in the hall doing activities as part of the orientation programme. The activities ended after 12 midnight.

Students nowadays seem to spend lots of time in school. Is it desirable? Do they really learn? What do they learn? Does it contribute towards the desired outcome of education?

A Heart-warming Call from My Book Reader...

There is nothing more delightful, heart-warming and spiritually-uplifting than to receive a call from a reader of my book, "15 Forgotten Secrets ..." Thanks to Mr Geow.

Mr Geow is a businessman and the sole agent for a certain brand of CNC (Computer Numericaly Controlled) systems. He bought the book apparently for the children. But, he told me that before the children read it, he read it first that very evening after he bought the book.

He found the book easy to read. He was so impressed with the contents and the simplicity of the language used. He found that the book is equally good for adults as many adults tend to overlook those life principles that are so basic, due to our heavy daily work schedules.

On a separate note, he is keenly aware that internet business or doing business via the internet is the way to go. Well, we'll catch up again soon to interact and exchange ideas further.

What If Tomorrow Never Comes?

When I was with my good friend yesterday, he told me that his immediate superior, an Engineering Manager, aged 47, just passed away. I was told he died in the car in the morning when he was about to go to work. He actually suffered from a heart attack or seizure. My friend told me his manager was even fitter than him and was always very active at work, running around getting things done and chairing meetings and so on. He worked long hours including Saturdays and Sundays. He did have a history of heart conditions. Anyway, it is sad to hear of his death. He is survived by his wife and two teenage children. Well, that is life. No one could predict.

Years back, the father of my eldest son's classmate, riding his motorcycle on his way to work in the morning was knocked down by a car. He died half an hour later. Did he plan for it? Obviously not.

When I share with many people in my seminar that "I live as if I will die tomorrow", some would think that it is a negative thought. Actually, it is not. In fact, that is being positive about life. Yesterday is over. Tomorrow is unknown. What we have is the present moment, today. Most people like to put off to tomorrow what can be done today because they assume that tomorrow will come. But, what if tomorrow never comes?

So, do not procrastinate. Whatever we have to do, do it now. Whatever we have to say, say it now. Whoever we have to hug, hug him/her now. Why do we have to wait until tomorrow? Why must we wait till someone lies in the coffin, then we start giving a long eulogy about him? Would it help more if such praises were said to him when he was alive?

May you be blessed by the message here today. That is why I am publishing it for you today, just in case tomorrow never comes for me. If it comes, thank God for a new day. I will write some more for you. Cheers........

Teach Less and Learn More!!!

Recently, I was told that the Ministry of Education is encouraging the schools, or the teachers more specifically, to "Teach Less and Learn More"!!!

Hmmm... I am not sure how the teachers are going to do it? As I was just told, when a Head of Department in a certain school found my book, "15 Forgotten Secrets ...." useful and relevant for the students, a teacher (presumably a young one) immediately asked "where is the worksheet?"..........You see... There she goes again!!! Worksheets, assignments, homework, assessments etc...

HOW to teach less and learn more?

To learn more, the students need to interact more, discuss more and communicate more, NOT worksheet after worksheet!!!

I hope the younger teachers would learn to understand MOE instructions in perspective and be creative in their methods of teaching and delivery, and NOT to read the MOE instructions by the punctuations. I am speaking from my experience as a partner in adult and children education.

We BETTER Work Together !!!

I visited the corporate office of a very large international firm today. The office was grand and magnificent. The RGB cables for the Notebook PCs were hidden away under a flip-cover along the spine of the long oval conference table. It is indeed a modern office. The receptionist at the front desk was simply sweet and polite, seemingly fluent in both English and Mandarin. I was there 10 minutes before my scheduled appointment time. I was invited to take a seat across the reception.

I was reminded of those days when I was working in a corporate environment holding senior managerial position. I used to read a monthly publication entitled, "Productivity Digest". At that time, there was a slogan that said, "Together, we work better". That was printed on banners hanging across the facade of buildings or across the fence, or on the walls within the factory buildings. That was intended to foster team spirit resulting in effective teamwork, for better productivity. That was the productivity campaign in Singapore.

In Japan, they have another slogan using the same four words but sequenced differently. They say, "We BETTER work together". Do you realise the difference in the attitude of people? The former takes things more leisurely while the latter takes things very seriously as if there were no alternatives. Such a difference in the mental attitude explains the difference in the productivity performance of employees in both countries.

I used to say this when I was lecturing about productivity, "Do more with less". Do more work with less time. Earn more money with less time. Make more finished products with less raw materials....

What Is In It For Me? ... The FIVE Ks !

I have recently met many new friends in my neighbourhood. There was this couple who was so kind and warm as we begin to share about our involvement in voluntary community service. We realised that there were people who serve with a true heart, while there were some who serve with some personal agenda. Well, that is pretty normal by human nature when people begin to ask, "What is in it for me?". If there is no benefit, why should I? In the real world, it is "every one for themselves"!

While Singaporeans are known to have been pursuing the five Cs (Car, Condominium, Cash, Credit card, Children), many people are not aware that Singaporeans have also acquired the five Ks in the process.

What are the five Ks? "Ka-Ki-Ko-Ka-Ki" as it is read in Hokkien dialect! Formally translated, it means "Everyone for themselves".

It is not difficult to find most residents staying in public housing flats have their main door closed and locked the moment they get into their home, some even slam their door as if the neighbours have offended them!!!

By closing the door, it cuts off communication and interaction with the neighbours next door. It is a common situation that most residents do not know who their neighbours upstairs and downstairs are. Why? They have never met and interacted even after more than a decade of staying in the same block.

The older generation of Singaporeans who have experienced the "kampung" ( a Malay word for village) lifestyle would remember that those days, every household would have their doors (front and back) open so that their neighbours are welcomed to visit them. That was where the kampung spirit was developed. A lot more examples can be shared. Perhaps, I should leave them till I write a book on this one day... hehehee...

Having said all these, we should not generalise things. There are Singaporeans who are pretty friendly, neighbourly, and helpful. Well, we just wish that there are more of them.

From Single-Tasking to Multi-Tasking!!!

Do you still remember those days when many of us were using the 5-1/4 inch Floppy Disk, then came the 3-1/2 in Floppy Disk, and then the Zip Disk. Later years, came the CD-R and CR-RW, and most recently the DVD-R and DVD-RW. Of course, hanging with a strap over the neck of some of the office executives are the Thumb Drives which can store as much as 1GB of data or even more.

It is so easy and convenient to carry data around nowadays. This morning, when I was delivering the motivational talk at Boston Business School, it was the first time that I did not bring my own notebook PC. Instead, I brought only my thumb drive. It is that convenient!

Information Technology (IT) and its related products have certainly evolved and changed very rapidly. Back in the eighties, many of us were using Disk Operating System (DOS) where we could only run one computer programme or software at a time, if you remember Word Perfect and Word Star! But, today, we can run multiple windows programmes at the same time, as long as your RAM is large enough to support them. Basically, the computers nowadays are able to multi-task. What about us?

It is about time that many of us should learn to multi-task. It may seem impossible to do a few things at the same time. It may seem unconventional to do a few jobs at the same time. It may seem like a conflict of interests if we were to do a few businesses at the same time. Hmmmm.. this is the perception of many. I believe it would take a while for such an idea to gain acceptance and popularity.

In 1996, I already came across a book entitled "Multipreneuring". I have helped many of my friends and colleagues to buy the book at discounted price through bulk purchase. The idea presented made a lot of sense to me. Well, when the time is right, I would share more about this topic. That is all for now...

Motivational Talk at Boston Business School

The following message was typed into the Pocket PC in the MRT on my way to Boston Business School at around 10.30am

It was certainly a good start for the year 2006. Boston Business School, under the leadership of Mr Patrick Fernandez, has invited me to speak to two groups of students as a part of their orientation programme as they are about to embark on a new educational pursuit.

I will be delivering my flagship motivational programme entitled "Secrets of Success for Students". The talk is based on the contents my book, "15 Forgotten Secrets That Will Make You A Student".

A good number of schools have also invited me to deliver a similar talk in their schools in 2006. After the talk, the book will be offered to students at a special price. In fact, one school has already decided to adopt this book as a supplementary reading material for an entire cohort. I am glad that the school leaders in-charge could appreciate the value of this book for which principals, teachers, trainers and many other educators have written review. I am deeply appreciative of them.

May this book continue to motivate the readers to learn how to learn, and to take learning as a lifelong process.

Begin With The End In Mind...

My friend's brother-in-law, aged around 50, was recently diagnosed with Leukaemia. He has been in the intensive care unit (ICU) for a couple of weeks by now and he is on a drip.

He used to be very health-conscious and always advises his friends to eat healthy. Many are surprised that he is suffering from Leukaemia now. Of course, he was worried about his worsening conditions. He began to seek spiritual comfort and he requested for a church pastor to pray for him, not taking up other suggestions of his sister. I was told later that he accepted Christianity as his faith because his brother who passed away two years ago also accepted Christianity as his faith towards the end of his life. My friend told me that now, he feels peace in his heart. He is able to take the situation much better now. Just pray that he would be fine soon so that he would get to share his own testimonial.

In fact, I have authored a simple booklet on "Who Says Only Jesus Saves?" first in Chinese followed by an English translation on my own. This book talks about a purpose-driven faith. Well, it is waiting to be published. There is a book entitled "A Purpose-Driven Life" by Rick Warren. It is a good book. Get a copy soon if you have not.

There is no other time more appropriate than to start the new year 2006 with a clear purpose of our lives. The purpose sets the direction for us to live our lives, so that we could make the best use of our time to get the most out of our lives. It is like what Stephen Covey wrote in his book, "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" where he talks about "Begin With The End In Mind". Decide on the END that we want, commit the necessary resources and be determined to achieve it.

I would like to share with you a quote which I wrote some time back - "To be successful, FOCUS on your GOALs, NOT your problems. Never take your eyes off your goal."

May you succeed in achieving your goals in 2006.